{"id":131,"date":"2011-05-18T14:30:00","date_gmt":"2011-05-18T14:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/uncategorized\/witch-stole-my-dress\/"},"modified":"2011-05-18T14:30:00","modified_gmt":"2011-05-18T14:30:00","slug":"witch-stole-my-dress","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/?p=131","title":{"rendered":"Witch Stole My Dress"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>So I waited a whole effing year for that wedding and then what happens? Oh, just an F5 tornado. AND THEN KATE HAD THE NERVE TO STEAL MY DRESS. I was sooo mad. Well, okay I love her, but I mean Kate for real? God just made me face my biggest fear, and then you steal my dress! Is that a joke? I bet y&#8217;all don&#8217;t believe me, but y&#8217;all know that &#8220;file&#8221; I always talk about? There is something in that bad boy that looks almost identical. Now, if I wear my dress I will look like a copy-kate WHEN THE TRUTH IS Kate, copied Cat!<\/p>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: auto;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><a href=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-mhIoFxMgbAQ\/TdKCizCV0cI\/AAAAAAAABg8\/fD6w5L6NZOo\/s1600\/17559567_sqvreMSI_c.jpg\" style=\"margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;\" data-imagelightbox=\"g\"><img loading=\"lazy\" border=\"0\" height=\"640\" src=\"http:\/\/3.bp.blogspot.com\/-mhIoFxMgbAQ\/TdKCizCV0cI\/AAAAAAAABg8\/fD6w5L6NZOo\/s640\/17559567_sqvreMSI_c.jpg\" width=\"400\" \/><\/a><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\">Aline. Lace. Scandy neckline. I&#8217;m tellin&#8217; y&#8217;all a hacker from Alexander McQueen got in my file.&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\">&nbsp;I bet y&#8217;all thought I was going to show you my dress didn&#8217;t you? Psh, what do y&#8217;all take me for? An idiot? I know you bridezilla-older-than-me-biotches would steal my brilliance in a heart beat. Whoa, almost lost my cool there for a second. Let&#8217;s talk about Kate and her dress. And her balding husband. AND HER HOT BROTHER-IN-LAW! I mean what?&nbsp;We can talk about Pippa too. &nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\">Here&#8217;s ya topic. The Royals and their friends.&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\">Ready. Set. Go.&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><\/div>\n<div style=\"clear: both; text-align: center;\"><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>So I waited a whole effing year for that wedding and then what happens? Oh, just an F5 tornado. AND THEN KATE HAD THE NERVE TO STEAL MY DRESS. I was sooo mad. Well, okay&hellip; <a href=\"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/?p=131\" class=\"more-link\">View Post<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[8],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/131"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=131"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/131\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=131"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=131"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.perpetual-perfection.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=131"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}